Reflection on the epilogue of DH

to me the epilogue was JKs attempt to stop certain fics from developing. Especially the slash pairings:) like H/D but to me she hasn`t succeded at all. 

1. it takes Harry seven years to produce offspring. Well what happend before? 
2. people don`t meet their one true love at 11 and get married at 24 while being with them the whole time.
3. Harry is 36 when the book ends, Draco as well, yummy adult love:)

I can`t wait to see what fanfiction writers will come up with crappy epilogue or not. 

Some ships won`t sink, no matter how hard the author tries.

And that is actually what consoled me after putting the book away and having to surpress my gagreflex from way to much sugar....